Just A Question
by Bookwrm389
Summary: Ed and Al discuss the mysteries of the afterlife. With limited results. Warning, contains classic Ed-religion-bashing.


_A.N. Though I consider myself a Christian, I'm not a very religious person. Any talk about religion in general actually makes me uncomfortable because it's such a personal subject for so many people. So what the heck am I doing going out of my comfort zone to write this?! But in all honesty, Ed's view on religion is fascinating and it's hard to tell whether he's truly an atheist or just very, very angry at God in general. Though it seems kind of hypocritical to say he doesn't believe when he's got a disembodied soul for a brother._

_By the way, Ed's views do NOT reflect my own beliefs! Just thought I'd clear that up in case someone gets offended._

Just A Question

"Brother? Can I, uh…ask you something?"

"…"

"Brother?"

"………"

"_Brother_."

"Ah! Wha…huh?"

"…never mind."

"Never mind what?"

"Well I was _going_ to ask you a question, but you're sleeping."

"_Was, _you mean. What were you gonna ask me?"

"I already said never mind. You'll think it's stupid anyway."

"No, come on Al. It can't be _that _stupid if it's important enough to wake me up. Unless you're gonna ask me if you can go get that cat we passed on the street…"

"No Brother…it wasn't that."

"Then just ask me already!"

"What…what do you think Heaven is like?"

"_Excuse_ me?"

"See, I told you it was stupid…"

"Damn right it is. _Really_, Al? You wake me up to ask me about some philosophical religious crap that we can't even prove or disprove the existence of? That _really_ makes my night, let me tell you."

"You don't have to be so _grumpy_ about it! It's just a question!"

"A question that's turning my little brother into an annoying pest. Can I _sleep_ now? We have an early train tomorrow."

"…"

"_Thank_ you."

"…it's _not_ crap."

"What's not? Heaven? Fine, but it's _definitely_ a myth."

"So is the Philosopher's Stone. And yet we're willing to give up everything and risk it all on the slightest possibility that it can be made and used safely by human hands."

"Well…yeah, but…"

"And no one can prove or disprove the existence of a soul either. It's the missing element to human transmutation, invisible and untouchable. Are you going to call my existence a myth as well?"

"No, of course not! I just--!"

"Please…just tell me what you really think, Brother. I want to know."

"I…well, I…I guess I've never really thought about it. I've had other stuff on my mind, what with the whole chasing a myth thing to worry about…"

"_Brother_…"

"Okay, okay! They always say it's supposed to be some kind of paradise where people go when they die, right? And people always pray to the sky, saying God's looking down on us. Put two and two together and we can safely assume Heaven is somewhere in the sky. Therefore, Heaven contains lots of blue skies and clouds and sunshine and a few trillion happy, happy souls."

"Now you're just being acerbic."

"Acer-what? I'm being _scientific!_ Remember what that means? Creating a hypothesis based on observation and critical thinking? That's what any _sane_ person does!"

"I didn't ask for a hypothesis, Brother! I wanted your honest opinion!"

"How am I supposed to have an opinion on someplace I've never even seen?!"

"Argh, just forget it! I'm _never_ going to get a straight answer out of you!"

"Good! Then we can just forget it!"

"Fine!"

"_Fine!_"

"………"

"…I just don't _get_ why you want to talk about this. I mean, what's the point? Whether Heaven exists or not, it's not like we can _do_ anything about it. Pondering the mysteries of the universe won't bring the answers to our door."

"And you're okay with using that as an excuse to just not think about it at all?"

"That _was_ the plan."

"Well _I _think about it. I just…I want to…"

"Hm?"

"I want to believe that Mom's soul is happy, wherever she is now. That the pain she was in when she died wasn't the last thing she ever felt. That probably sounds so childish, but it's how I feel."

"…no, Al. That's not childish at all."

"I just wonder what her idea of Heaven would be and whether the real thing comes close to it."

"Heh…that's the big question, isn't it? I hate it when people start going off about Heaven because everyone has such different ideas on what it _should_ be instead of what it actually is. All the happy-go-lucky religious people say it's an incredible place where our souls can bask in eternal bliss…"

"…while the unhappy people stubbornly insist it's all philosophical religious crap?"

"Sheesh, throw _that _in my face why don't ya?"

"So what do _you_ think it should be like, Brother?"

"Hmm…Risembool."

"Risembool?"

"Yeah. Before Mom died and Hohenheim left us. Back when we were all together and happy, no military and no human transmutations. When I think of our lives then…I think the happiness we felt when we were kids is the closest we'll ever come to Heaven. So how about you, Al? What's your Heaven like?"

"I guess…a world without pain and suffering."

"Hey! That's pretty generic considering how much I just told you!"

"W-Well, I hadn't really thought much beyond that…"

"_What?!_ And you're getting on _me _for being aerobic or whatever the hell word you used?!"

"_Acerbic!_ Jeez Brother, get a thesaurus!"

"What does that even mean?!"

"It means bitter and resentful!"

"…"

"…"

"…you think I'm bitter and resentful?"

"Sometimes. Just some of the things you say…it's almost like you resent everything we've become."

"Don't you?"

"I don't resent all the second chances we've been given. Not for a minute."

"We weren't _given_ anything, Al. Everything we've become now was earned through our own actions, our _own_ strength. We don't have anyone to thank for that but ourselves."

"I think God might disagree with you."

"Oi! Don't bring _him_ into it! This conversation is strictly limited to Heaven! Are we clear on that, Alphonse?"

"_Yes_, Brother."

"Was that _sarcasm_ I heard?"

"_No_, Brother…hey, Ed?"

"Yeah?"

"I like your idea of Heaven better. It would be nice if that's what it was really like."

"Who knows? Maybe since everyone has a different idea of Heaven, we'll all end up in our own personal Heavens."

"But then everyone would be alone forever! I would hate that!"

"Hey, I'm just theorizing here!"

"Trust _you _to come up with a theory that makes Heaven sound so morbid…"

"…"

"…"

"Well…maybe there's something we can do about it. Tell you what, Al. When I think of Heaven and you think of Heaven, let's both think of Risembool. That way when we die of old age or whatever, whoever calls the shots up there will know to send us to the same place. How does that sound?"

"…"

"Al?"

"Yeah…I like that idea."

"Good. _Now_ can I sleep?"

"Sure. But Brother?"

"Hm?"

"…can we bring the cat too?"


End file.
